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Wednesday, November 11, 2009

Party Profiles

From the outside world, party animals are all the same; they all like to drink, dance and stay up late. However, for people who actually party, we realize that there are more types of partyphiles than most people think. Some are good to be with, some, one should just stay away from. Unfortunately, when you are drunk and are too familiar with the faces in a bar, you forget that some of them may not be good for you. Here’s a simple reminder on whom you could meet at a bar.

Newbie: First-timers in the party scene. They move scour the club with wide-eyed excitement, and you can feel it when they enter the bar. They aren’t quite sure what to do, and everything they choose to do seem awkward. If you spot one, beware. There is a huge possibility that this party-newbie will puke all over the bar (being too excited to party, s/he over-drinks).

Mannequins: The group of girls who go to bars just to dress up and show off their new outfits, shoes, hand bags, and trophy boyfriends. They do not actually intend to drink, or dance, party at all. Mannequins just go to clubs to display themselves and wait for praises.

Leech: The guy with the DJ. He has no actual function. He just stands by the DJ and avails of the free drinks the DJ gets; and sometimes, the chicks too.

Hello Kitty: People who know everybody. They can almost work as the door man/door lady because they greet everybody that comes to the bar. These are a friendly lot.

Confused Kitty: People who THINK they know everybody. It makes them feel important. They assume that they have been in the party scene for too long, that everybody must know them. It doesn’t mean they’re popular; it just means they’re old.

Emo: Emos. I don’t need to explain this. It is unfortunate that they have to grace us with their presence.

Shakers: People who go to clubs to dance. Sometimes they do it freestyle, sometimes they have choreographed dance moves. They don’t drink much, and they don’t socialize with other people much either. They just dance with the group of friends they arrived with, and sometimes, some willing dance partners.

Ninja: People who disappear when it is time to pay, or when they are too drunk. These people come to a party late, but leave early. When they are too tired, too drunk, or too poor they decide to leave the bar without even waving ‘goodbye’ to their friends.

Hamper: Also known as the fashion disaster. She throws all the fashion trends together in one outfit; thus making her look like last season’s fashion collection vomited on her. Trust me, they think they look great so do not say anything about their ensemble.

Models: These people go to parties just to take cool pictures of themselves. They waste their time inside a bar just to get great pictures that they could upload in social networking sites so people would believe that they have fabulous lives.

Shark: Also known as “players”. These are guys who scout the premises to find their next girl friend, fling, or lay. If you are a female, beware of sharks, your relationship might end the next time he has an opportunity to party.

Have you found yourself fitting into one of these stereotypes? Be honest, don’t deny who you really are. None of these stereotypes are bad, they just happen to be the reality. Remember: there are stereotypes because too many people do the same thing.

Watch out for the second part of Party Profiles next week.

For comments, suggestions, and more confessions from this partyphile log on to

Catch Confessions of a partyphile (the radio show) every Wednesdays, 6 to 9 PM on 105.9 Mix FM or

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