Top Ten Alcohol Myths

Alcohol is one of the most important elements of a party. A party without alcohol is like a cheeseburger without cheese; it just does not make sense. It has gone by many names. People call it a social lubricant, the devil’s drink, a person’s poison of choice; I just call it my best friend.

And because everything is better with alcohol, here are some alcohol related myths that I’m sure you’d find interesting.

10 Coffee helps drunken people get sober – Only time can make a person get sober. It does not matter how much coffee you drink, how many cold showers you take, how much exercise you get, the only way a person can get sober is by waiting. For how long? Well, it depends on how much alcohol you have actually consumed. Alcohol leaves the body at a rate of .015 percent of blood alcohol content for every hour. If you consume five times that amount, then you have to wait for five hours to get sober. Do I know how much alcohol makes up .015 percent of your blood? No. This is why I am a partyphile, and not a doctor. If you know how much .015 blood alcohol content translates to in beer bottles or tequila shots, then you must be brainy enough to know that coffee does not solve anything…aside from a cause of drowsy.

9 Beer gets you in the mood to party – Contrary to popular belief, beer is not a good option for partying because too much of it can make a person feel drowsy. This is because beer contains lactoflavin and nicotinic acid that promote sleep. It also contains hops that have been found to be a natural sedative. This is why, I always tell you to go for some cool cocktail. Even something as basic as a Rum-Coke would keep you ready to party (because of the caffeine). If dancing is what you plan to do with your Saturnights, skip the beer.

8 Bottled Tequila contain worms- I am sure you have heard all those stories about how some Tequila bottles contain worms. But according to my study, most Tequila bottles do not contain worms. Mescal is actually the alcoholic beverage that contains worms. And, to bust another myth, they aren’t really worms; they are butterfly caterpillars or guranos. So there. Tequila bottles do not have worms; such a thing does not exist. Start talking about Mescal with butterfly caterpillars in case the topic comes up; it will make you seem like you know so much about alcohol and that is always a good thing.

7 Men and women of the same height and weight can take the same amount of alcohol - Women always consume less alcohol because they have more fat that allows alcohol to concentrate more easily in their bodies. Women also have less amounts of dehydrogenase in their bodies, an enzyme that breaks alcohol down.

6 Beer has low alcohol counts – The highest alcohol count for a commercial beer is 41% which is a little over the alcohol content in most Tequila and Vodka brands. This beer is produced by Brewdog and is named “Sink the Bismarck” which could only be purchased online. A 330 ml bottle costs roughly Php 2, 600. With a price tag like that, I would rather go for some Tequila and save myself from all the hassle of ordering online.

5 People who don’t drink are alcohol free – Actually, our bodies produce a small amount of alcohol twenty four hours a day, seven days a week from time we are born until the day we die. So nobody is truly free of alcohol; they just don’t know it.

4 A beer belly is caused by beer – It is caused by eating too much not drinking too much. No amount of beer, or any other type of alcohol, is necessary to achieve a beer belly.

3 Alcohol destroys brain cells – When taken in moderation alcohol helps in mental or cognitive functioning. It does not destroy the brain cells; however, it affects a person’s response time and motor skills.

2 Alcohol causes weight gain – this is a very common misconception. However, extensive research has proven that it does not cause weight gain in males and even helps females lose a small amount of weight.

1 Alcohol pills are just a joke on FB – I’m sure everyone has seen those photos on Facebook about red Horse capsules. It may look cute and funny, but it might just come true in the near future. Russian scientist Evgeny Moskalev has actually found a way to turn ANY type of liquid into powder form. The scientist might have had too much fun with the experimentation, or he just happened to have a hot bangin’ party in his lab one day, but he somehow managed to think of turning vodka into powder. The experiment was successful and has been tried on other types of alcohol. The powderized alcohol may be placed inside pills to be taken orally or may be snorted for a more potent hit.