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Tuesday, March 20, 2012

Do You Give Away Your Number in a Club/Bar?


Should You Give Out Your Number?

Hey partyphile readers! I’m glad to be receiving more queries from you. I hope you could send me some more by tweeting me at twitter.com/zhaun or by sending me a message on my facebook account, facebook.com/partyphile. You may also add me up on BBM (pin: 22A74B9A).Here’s another question I’m sure a lot of women can relate to. Here goes:

Dear Partyphile,

I love your column! I find it very interesting and informative. I have a question for you: What do I do when a guy asks for my number inside a club? Should I give it out? Should I not? What if I like the guy?

Thanks in advance for the help!

Carla S.


Hey Carla! I’ve had to think about this question long and hard before I got a solution that I think can actually work. Now here is the thing, when a guy asks for your number inside a bar, do not assume that he likes you. Some guys just ask for numbers as a dare, a game, or just to check if they haven’t lost their swag yet. Now, whatever happens to the offer relies on you.

Here is the thing, whether the guy likes you or not is irrelevant. What matters is whether you like the guy. Most girls would automatically shun off guys who ask for their numbers because they find it creepy. But take a look at the situation form the man’s point of view and realize that it takes a lot of guts to actually come up to a girl and ask for her number. So please, if you can, be gentle when you let them down and refuse to give your number away. So what do you do? Should you give your number? No.

Giving your number away just tells the guy that you are interested. That is the worse thing you could do, even if you really are (interested). You see, dating is a chase; a chase that guys enjoy. So whether you like him or not, when he asks for your number, do not give it. So do you ask for his? You can, but what will you do with it?

Again, if you ask for his number the responsibility now lies on you. You could also throw it away, end of story (unless you like him). If you do like then what would you do?  If you text or call him, that would tell him without a sliver of doubt, that you’re into him. Again, that’s not very smart because you have to be mysterious; you have to be worth the chase. So here are the things you can do:

1.)    If you don’t like him, just tell him that you’d rather keep your number private.
2.)    If you like him, don’t give away your number or ask for his. Again, that will make you seem easy. What you can do is dare him to do something fun like drinking a bottle of beer in less than two minutes. You could even dare him to go head to head in a drinking contest with your friend. If he agrees, then at least he made the effort and that’s commendable. It also gives you the opportunity to give your number without seeming “easy” if he accomplishes the dare. If he disagrees, then he probably wasn’t that into you anyway.

So the next time a guy approaches you and asks for you number, dare him to do something crazy and know whether he’s willing to put in some effort just to get to know you; or whether he’s just asking for your number for the cheap thrill.


I hope that answered your question and I hope you write us again!

Catch Confessions of a Partyphile (the radio show) on 105.9 Mix FM every Wednesdays from 6PM to 9PM. For questions, comments, suggestions, and more confessions from this partyphile, log on to http://party.i.ph or follow the columnist at twitter.com/zhaun

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