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Wednesday, December 22, 2010

New Christmas Commandments

It has been two years since I released my first version of the Partyphile Christmas Commandments and I am releasing another version today because I find that it is good to have some guidelines when we are caught up in way too much celebrating and way too much boozing. And although I am not one to be preachy and tell you how you should spend your Christmas, I find that these commandments give me a well-balanced look at the Yuletide season. In a sense, these commandments help me keep sight of what Christmas truly means. Being a partyphile makes it easy to lose sight of that, and we all know that everybody transforms into a partyphile during the Yuletide season. For this cause I give you my Christmas Commandments:


1Thou shall not gain a gazillion pounds- We all know the dangers that the seemingly never-ending slew of Christmas parties brings: overly indulgent buffets. Yes, it is quite hard to resist all those sumptuous dishes and keep our waistlines in check. I for one, have always succumbed to the call of that gorgeous glazed Jamon de Bola. And although it is quite tempting to just let go of your year-long diet and finally say “hello” to a life sans calorie-counting, it just makes life harder post-Christmas. In the end, it is your call, but be sure to have a closet full of clothes a size-too-big, just in case. Oh, and if it helps, just think of how you’ll look in all those Christmas photos! Remember: though it is the season to be jolly, it is NOT the season to totally forget about your belly.


2Thou shall not be grumpy this season- Everybody hates the Grinch. Why? Because he is always grumpy and tries to ruin the spirit of Christmas. Why? Because he is an insecure little snob with too many emotional problems; no shrink could probably fix him. We don’t notice it sometimes, but we too may have the tendency to act like the Grinch, and you don’t want to be the Christmas spoiler now, do you? Be a little nicer, greet everyone with a smile, and just spread the holiday cheer.


3Thou shall party a little harder- Come on. Your close friends are sure to be in the mood to party a little harder this holiday season. Go with the season and party a little harder, dear reader. And I’m not just talking about partying more often, just try to be in a more festive mood and enjoy everybody’s company. After all, everyone is always a couple of bucks richer come Christmas time.


4 Thou shall not break the bank- It is true that it is the thought that truly counts, if you do not have a budget to buy everyone special to you a gift this season, then write them a sincere Holiday card. I am sure they will appreciate it much more. And please do not ever recycle gifts. Its just plain gross. One should give gifts not for duty, not for reciprocity, and not for personal satisfaction; one should give for the sheer joy of giving.


5Thou shall not dress in red and green- Horrendous. Who in their right mind would dress up like a Christmas tree? Red and green is reserved for Christmas ornaments, not your clothes. Do everyone a favor and please do not don holiday colors. It’s just not cool.


6Thou shall let out thou’s inner child- Christmas time is the perfect time to remember the simples things and life and to see the world through the eyes of a child. Remember the greatest gifts you have: family, friends, and the maturity that partying may be guilt-free.


7Thou shall not have false idols- PSPs, iPads and Blackberries are not the things that make up Christmas. Remind yourself that the novelty and gratification you will get from these gadgets will only last until the New Year. Think of what really matters and you are sure to cut your Christmas wish list in half.


8Thou shall self indulge- Christmas is a time for loving, yet most of us forget to love ourselves a little bit more during the holidays. So self-indulge and do what you really want. Go to the beach, have a massage, buy yourself that thing you have been eyeing for so long. Now is the perfect time to give yourself what you deserve, even if it is a little capricious. After all, if you aren’t going to look out for yourself, nobody else will.


9Thou shall spend Christmas happily alone- Spending Christmas alone isn’t something to feel bad about; one can do so much more than just mope around at home while playing sappy Christmas songs and indulging in self pity. One does not have to feel bad about not being able to, or not wanting to, spend Christmas time with their family. If there is one thing that watching too many re-runs of Sex and the City has taught me, it is that you could choose to spend any joyous moment with the family you born in, or the family you choose to make for yourself. So gather everyone you know who can’t be home for the holidays and spread the yuletide cheer. After all, the real essence of Christmas is not found in the people you choose to spend it with; it is about being happy, no matter what.


10Thou shall keep the “Christ” in Christmas- We often think of Christmas and remember Old Saint Nick; but Santa Claus and gift-giving sometimes distracts us into thinking that this holiday is really about Christ. I am not trying to be preachy here, and I certainly am in no position to give you readers a lecture on religion; but all I ask is for every partyphile to step back a little, and for once, give the spotlight to the person who really matters this season: Jesus the Christ.

Catch Confessions of a Partyphile (the radio show) on 105.9 Mix FM every Wednesday nights from 6 to 9 PM. For comments, suggestions, and more confessions from this partyphile, you may log on to http//party.i.ph or follow the columnist at http://twitter.com/zhaun

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